Not getting it... - JJLinn's Blog

JJLinn's Blog

Not getting it...

Posted on August 15, 2009 at 12:18 AM.

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There's just days where I feel terrible for no reason...like today. It started out fine, I was out watching my dogs, no problems. Then work calls to ask if I can work extra hours tomorrow (I can't). All of a sudden, I get a huge panic attack. Every time work comes up or I'm about to go into work, I get a panic attack, and I have no idea why. That never happened when I worked at Panera. I don't know how to describe how I feel, other than depressed, but it's just so weird. I had to leave because I couldn't be alone any longer...I needed to be around people just to be sane, but even that didn't work. That was EXACTLY what I felt when I was at BGSU, but now it seems worse. I feel really alone for some reason, I feel like there's not enough time in the day for me to enjoy myself, and all these panic attacks are starting to scare me. The one that started when work called is still going on, and it's been 6 hours since then. I can't get help yet because I don't have the money to pay for an appointment, I have to wait until my paycheck comes. I hate this, and usually I'd have my best friend to talk to to calm me down, but she's not there anymore.